Week 8 LoL FFL Post:

Attention all L.O.L.L.E.A.G.U.E. agents, this is Kyriacos Rogers. You’ve heard a lot about me over the past 7 weeks that I’ve been whooping everyone’s ass! Sadly, some of you were ordered to hunt me down. But I think it’s time you know the truth. L.O.L.L.E.A.G.U.E. is not what we thought it was. It’s been taken over by GAYDRA and Christopher PierceDudesAssholes is their leader. I don’t know how many more have fallen to his gay ways, but I know his homosexual army is still building. They almost have what they want. Absolute control. They shot NazFury. And it won’t end there. If you launch those helicarriers today, GAYDRA will be able to homosexualize anyone that stands in their way. Unless we stop Chris! We must get Agent McCaffery back to foil his evil plans! I know I’m asking a lot. But the price of freedom is high. It always has been. And it’s a price I’m willing to pay, so I don’t fall with the gayness too. And if I’m the only straight one left, then so be it. But I’m willing to bet I’m not. GAYDRA will not win Chris!

AVENGERS ASSEMBLE!!!

WEEK 8

KupptinAmerica/Hockeye vs NazFury

Sadly, in my old age, I gave my shield to Kupptin America, and he’s been dominating foes with it week after week! Fortunately for NazFury, Hockeye was left inactive while battling the Yakuza faction in Tokyo. Somehow NazFury survives a -5-point Chicago defense while New England outscored them by 18 on his bench! If Yas simply had a decent QB in the lineup that didn’t continually look like a woman, things would have been different. NazFury at the end of this week just looked up at Yas and asked him to exit the donut. NazFury improves to 4-4 tied for the division lead. I promise you fALIcon, I made a huge mistake in giving KupptinAmerica my shield! Super Soldier Serum is the only explanation for his recent play!

Kyriacos Rogers vs fALIcon

Just like the 19 years I was trapped in ice, I froze when I heard the news about my beloved Derrick. He was lost during the war, and I sadly was red skull fucked so good! On the positive note Travis Kelce and Graham Gano were found out as GAYDRA operatives. With fALIcon down 12 points going into Monday night, I was expecting a ‘’On your left’’ as he passed me by. However, those comforting words never came. Instead, both Jalen Hurts and DHop left their respective games early, which helped a ton. I have all faith this winter you will be the ultimate soldier fALIcon! God speed!

Humzakajima vs Parthy Barnes

This was straight up MURDER! Parthy wanted Mr. Humzakajima to know that ‘’his son Dak was murdered by the Winter Soldier….and that was me.’’ When asked why, Parthy simply replied ‘’I didn’t have a choice’’. So sad for Humzakajima to have to roll out the overpaid inept waiter Kirk Cousins. But let’s be honest this bloodbath was over faster than James became Bucky! If only Humzakajima could have his memories as foggy as the early Winter Soldier, all would be okay. But instead, he wishes he could become a brainwashed cyborg assassin too! Anything for a W! Parthy improves to 4-4, which would be good for 1st place in the other division. If only the infinity formula wasn’t equivalent to the Johnson&Johnson of vaccines! Also, congrats to Parthy on finding his Gail!

Coltendict Cumberbatch aka Dr. Strange vs WaliWong

This gifted surgeon fell to his very own sidekick and valet in WaliWong! Besides for the WaliWong’s Chubb and O-BJ, everyone else showed up to play! Even the doctor’s mystical arts couldn’t get Noah Fant or Mike Williams to score any meaningful points! Arizona’s defense was no match for a non-symptomatic-non-vax’d Aaron Rodgers! WaliWong’s monk-like patience was rewarded when Tyreek and Mahomes sealed his victory on Monday night! Dr. Strange falls to 3-5 as his artifacts have lost their power.

Ahsanos vs Alex Stark

Ahsanos said ‘’Fine I’ll do it myself’’ and this time he was inevitable. Ahsanos wins three in a row but won’t take over the world thanks to Alex! With multiple players scoring in the single digits, Stark put on the glove, saved the world, and was ultimately declared dead. He lost the battle, but we all cry as ‘’We won Mr. Stark, we won.’’ plays over and over in our heads. We remember Alex Stark for the things he gave us. His countless underperforming running backs and his multitude of injuries. He gave his life so we could live. I love you 3000 Alex! And you indeed are our Iron Man!

Christopher PierceDudesAssholes vs Rimmeltana

Sadly, the homosexual sin and evil of GAYDRA runs deep within Chris. He leads that faction with ruthlessness and unabashed homoness! His housekeeper Rimmeltana was simply returning for a forgotten cell phone and wound up killed! Chris shot Rimmeltana directly in the chest, simply for not knocking. What a dick! This ends the win streak, but Rimmeltana will get justice next year! Chris finds himself still in the playoff race with a 86% chance of making it. Hopefully someone foils GAYDRA’s plan for world domination before we all turn as gay as Chris! Kyriacos Rogers will avenge you Rimmeltana! If I have to travel back in time and visit the gay bars that Chris frequents, while yelling Hail GAYDRA, I’ll do it! This isn’t over! No LilGayBoi will stand in my way! Based on projections Chris is supposed to lose this week and all will be restored and made right. In the meantime, I thought maybe I’ll try some of that life that Alex was telling me to get. And it was beautiful, truly.

But still FUCK CHRIS!

NOTES FROM NAZ

· Ahsan got the 49ers Defense over me in waivers cause of the worse record tiebreaker, leading me to choose the Bears over the Eagles defense for some reason… Almost cost me $10

· Kyriacos gets his replacement for Derrick Henry and doesn’t lose a step on his path to the playoffs with a win he did not deserve over Ali

· Ali and Alex started the year off undefeated at 4-0 and 3-0 respectively. Neither have won a game since then… Meanwhile, Ahsan who started 0-5, hasn’t lost since then…

· Only 3/12 teams are above .500 right now after 8 weeks into the season

· Only 6 games left in the regular season

· 4-4 is a playoff spot and I’m right in line to go 7-7 again, but will it lead to a playoff spot this year?

· 4-4 is the top of the Young Guns division and 5-4 is not guaranteed after this week. With 3 more weeks of interdivision play, there will be some interesting results going into the final 3 weeks of intra-division matchups… GO VETERAN LEADERS!

· Kyriacos 100% paid Travis Kelce to flop in the Giants game! Don’t @ me. He verified he was at the game and has repeatedly shown ties to players in pictures with Patrick Mahomes and videos with Tyler Lockett. There is no doubt!

Aaron Rodgers getting vaccinated

AUCTION REPORT

- Ahsan got Jeremy McNichols for $48 over Me ($7)

- Kcos got Adrian Peterson for $28 over Me ($23), Ali ($23)

- Rimmel got Saints defense for $13 over Me ($7), Ahsan ($5)

WEEKLY PAYOUTS

Week 8 Most Points: Nazim

- Humza: $10

- Yaseer: $10

- Kyriacos: $30

- Sean: $10

- Parth: $10

- Nazim: $10

Week 8 Least Points: Rimmel

- Kyriacos: 1

- Sean: 2

- Parth: 1

- Colten: 2

- Rimmel: 2

Kicker Impact in Week 8: Ali loses to Kcos 110.7-105.9, Kicker gave Kcos an extra 7 points for the win… Still not a fan Kyriacos?

YTD: 3x (Ali has been involved in all 3 and is now 2-1 because we have a kicker spot)

Halloween Candy

WEEK 8 POWER RANKINGS

WEEK 9 PREDICTIONS

Naz v Ahsan: 108-94

Alex v Colten: 78-105

Ali v Yas: 116-115

Rimmel v Kcos: 87-109

Humza v Chris: 123-101

Sean v Parth: 112-108

Top Scorer: Humza

Week 8 Predictions: 4-2

YTD: 23-19

WEEK 8 BETS REVIEW

Naz’s Pick-6 (Game Lines for Bets):

1. [L] Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-4.5) @ New Orleans Saints

2. [L] Jacksonville Jaguars (+3.5) @ Seattle Seahawks

3. [L] New England Patriots @ Los Angeles Chargers (-4)

4. [L] Cincinnati Bengals (-10.5) @ New York Jets

5. [W] Miami Dolphins @ Buffalo Bills (-14)

6. [W] Tennessee Titans (+2.5) @ Indianapolis Colts

Week 8: 2-4 | -280

YTD: 26-19-3 | +260

Naz’s Daily Dump (FanDuel Daily for Bets - $60,000: 50/50 League):

[LOSER] 51/100

QB: Joe Burrow - $7,800

RB: Khalil Herbert - $6,500

RB: Chubba Hubbard - $6,600

WR: Keenan Allen - $6,900

WR: Robert Woods - $6,800

WR: Stefon Diggs - $7,300

TE: Dallas Goedert - $5,900

FLEX: Mike Evans - $7,500

DEF: Buffalo Bills - $4,700

YTD: 4-3 | -30

51, when top 50 win...

WEEK 9 BETS

Naz’s Pick-6 (Game Lines for Bets):

1. Houston Texans (+5.5) @ Miami Dolphins

2. Las Vegas Raiders (-3) @ New York Giants

3. Buffalo Bills @ Jacksonville Jaguars (+14.5)

4. Los Angeles Chargers (-1.5) @ Philadelphia Eagles

5. Green Bay Packers @ Kansas City Chiefs (-7)

6. Arizona Cardinals @ San Francisco 49ers (-2.5)

Naz’s Daily Dump (FanDuel Daily for Bets - $60,000: 50/50 League):

QB: Derek Carr - $7,500

RB: Darrell Williams - $6,700

RB: Austin Ekeler - $9,000

WR: Hunter Renfrow - $5,600

WR: Tim Patrick - $5,600

WR: Stefon Diggs - $7,600

TE: Darren Waller - $6,800

FLEX: Zack Moss - $6,000

DEF: Buffalo Bills - $5,200